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|2es-ElGordo
Joined: Oct 04, 2005
Posts: 357
Location: Kent
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 Posted:
Fri Jun 08, 2007 4:55 pm |
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I walked into B&Q last night and some old boy dressed in orange asked me if I wanted decking.
Fortunately, I got the first punch in so that was the end of that....
ElGordo |
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|2es-1927
Joined: May 15, 2007
Posts: 403
Location: Capital of Wales
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Fri Jun 08, 2007 6:58 pm |
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I call my dog Cigarette cos its got no legs. I take her out for a drag every night.
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kehumff
Joined: Jun 20, 2006
Posts: 84
Location: Manchester UK
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Fri Jun 08, 2007 7:11 pm |
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A Meat Pie walks into a pub and says "Can i have a Pint?"
Barman Replies "Sod off we don`t serve food in here!" |
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Nitrokid
Joined: Nov 26, 2006
Posts: 287
Location: Mystical land of Mancunia
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Fri Jun 08, 2007 8:06 pm |
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| kehumff wrote: |
A Meat Pie walks into a pub and says "Can i have a Pint?"
Barman Replies "Sod off we don`t serve food in here!" |
oh, oh dear   |
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|2es-youoldduffer
Joined: Mar 30, 2006
Posts: 560
Location: wick
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Sat Jun 09, 2007 12:36 am |
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An Aussie once visited England. While there he was walking down a country lane alongside a farm. After a while he saw an English sheep farmer fucking one of his sheep. To this the Aussie yells, "Aye, Mate! In Australia we shear those!"
To which the farmer replies, "I ain't sharing nothing with you. Go and get your own.!" |
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Papasmurf
Joined: Mar 14, 2006
Posts: 231
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Tue Jun 12, 2007 12:57 pm |
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What did Hitler say to his men before they got in their tanks??
'Men, get in your tanks' |
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Papasmurf
Joined: Mar 14, 2006
Posts: 231
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Tue Jun 12, 2007 12:58 pm |
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Whats got four legs and can kill you??
A snooker table falling out of a tree |
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Papasmurf
Joined: Mar 14, 2006
Posts: 231
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Tue Jun 12, 2007 12:59 pm |
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| Nitrokid wrote: |
| kehumff wrote: |
A Meat Pie walks into a pub and says "Can i have a Pint?"
Barman Replies "Sod off we don`t serve food in here!" |
oh, oh dear |
A horse walks up to the bar to order a drink
Barman: 'why the long face?' |
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Papasmurf
Joined: Mar 14, 2006
Posts: 231
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Tue Jun 12, 2007 12:59 pm |
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I'll get my coat...  |
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|2es-ElGordo
Joined: Oct 04, 2005
Posts: 357
Location: Kent
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Tue Jun 12, 2007 1:14 pm |
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A bear walks into a pub and says
"Can I have
..........................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................
a pint of lager please"
and the barman says
"what's with the big pause"
ElGordo |
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Nitrokid
Joined: Nov 26, 2006
Posts: 287
Location: Mystical land of Mancunia
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Tue Jun 12, 2007 1:37 pm |
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Lock this thread, immediatley, or I will forced to become Hitler #2 |
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|2es-ElGordo
Joined: Oct 04, 2005
Posts: 357
Location: Kent
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Tue Jun 12, 2007 2:20 pm |
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quick, quick..........
2 goldfish in a tank ...
one says to the other..
"have you any idea how to drive this"
ElGordo |
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Nitrokid
Joined: Nov 26, 2006
Posts: 287
Location: Mystical land of Mancunia
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Tue Jun 12, 2007 2:25 pm |
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Ah well, I might as well
What does Mr Kipling do in his spare time?
Fills tarts with cream...
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|2es-ElGordo
Joined: Oct 04, 2005
Posts: 357
Location: Kent
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Tue Jun 12, 2007 2:30 pm |
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See, you can't resist eh.
What happened to the Avon lady?
MaxFactor
ElGordo |
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|2es-darfvader
Consoles Moderator
Joined: Nov 05, 2006
Posts: 846
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Tue Jun 12, 2007 4:10 pm |
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What sound does a Horny Toad make?
RUB IT, RUB IT.
Why don't chickens wear underwear?
Because their peckers are on their faces. |
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